More Changes

So I haven't written in over three months. It seems like so much has happened.
My 17 year-old brother left home because he didn't like the rules our family had and now realizes that we didn't have that many rules.
Because we shut down the church we had (because of my brother and more), my family (what's left of us) moved in with my grandfather and his wife.
I'm going to be working in Alaska this summer to pay my way through college (btw, I dropped out when I left Portland).
I'm driving over two hours every week because I have a temp job in Vancouver.
I'm so sad because I never get to see my friends from Portland.
However, that's changing cause I'll have more time to be with my friends in Portland (now that I work there 5 days a week).
Now I realize that I was addicted to having a secret from my parents. I didn't love him. I wanted something different and new. And he was. But I was stupid. I hurt him and I hurt me because of him. I really learned because of the time I had doing the wrong thing. It was one time I had to learn for myself; something that doesn't happen often.

Over all of this, I'm glad I've changed. I hope it's for the better. I pray it is. Through all of this I have had to have more faith and patience and longsuffering...and it just continues. Never think that it can't get any better, cause it can. It doesn't seem like that is the point but it really is. Things can always get better, you just don't know it yet.

Nicole